Sunday, April 23, 2006

False Advertising

My friend Chris once told us the story about his aunt, who at 60, straddles around with her fake tan and imagine that, velour-type sweatpants with the word "juicy" written across her butt.

In this instance, it is obvious that Chris's aunt's butt was, indeed, not juicy at all.

In the last couple of weeks, however, I have noticed a series of similar false advertising displays all around Seattle; two of these examples definitely worth mentioning to prove my point.

The first was a couple of weeks ago, where I, while waiting for my bus, spotted a fairly attractive girl, who was wearing her matching white hoodie/sweatpants combo. What is noteworthy, however, is the pants: they were white, almost see-through, made of soft material that definitely tightly hugged her butt, with the word "JUICY" stamped across it. Now, suffice it to say, that the contour was not that of a smooth pair of cheeks; on the contrary, one could definitely see not two sets of humps, but several little jiggly bits moving underneath the white canvas. I think it's fairly safe to say that what was hiding behind those pants, was in fact, a cottage cheese butt, if you get what I mean. So no, not "juicy" at all. "Jello-ish," maybe, but not "juicy."

My second encounter with this kind of overt false advertising took place just a couple of days ago, where, while walking home from work, I noticed a full-figured woman (come on, we're being PC here) proudly showing off her ultra-tight black t-shirt with the words "HOT STUFF" written across her boobonic rack in METALLIC SPARKLES. Now, I don't have anything against the well-endowned (in fact, I envy them, as I have small ones), but I believe that boobs that take up 3/4 of a woman's torax is NOT what I would call "HOT STUFF", especially when embellished by some tacky gold color sparkles.

Advertisers get sued all the time for false advertising, so why is it that people can walk around doing the same and not having to deal with the consequences???

Saturday, April 22, 2006

At Work on Sat

I'm finishing up some things at work. Yes, it's sad. Sat, nice, sunny day (which has been rare around these parts), and I'm at work by myself. It's been 4 hrs since I got here...

So the funny part is that my supervisor said that she is trying to get more headcount for this team; however, it's hard for her to make a case for that when Falguni and I are still working BELOW the department average. WHAT THE HELL??? I only see a few people that get here at 8:30 and the floors CERTAINLY clear up as soon as 5:30 rolls around. I've been working my butt off, 10+ hrs a day (with no lunch break and very few bathroom brakes, which must not be good) and now Saturday.

So I think to myself: Are these people LYING? Do these people really WORK FROM HOME as they claim they do? I'm all for believing in the good nature of people, but everything I see leads me to believe that there are some people who are lying about how many hours they work, messing up the department curve and making me look like a slacker.

I will have to do some investigation around here...

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Prayer Chain (Please don't die Diesel)

So Diesel and some guys took off this morning on their quest to summit Mount Rainier.
Simultaneously, I have started a prayer chain, where me, myself, and the few other people that care about him will pray for his safety and hope for his successful summit of Rainier.
You see, Diesel has not been training for this. Sure, the guy has done it once (but alternatively failed once too), but his previous attempts were preceeded by dedication, hard work and a good amount of training.

This time Diesel goes with only hope and the Hudson boys. Hope that he will make it without any sort of significant training and prep work and the Hudson boys, who both Brian and he have been referring to as "horses." The plan is to have the Hudson boys do all the bushwhacking. Not sure if the Hudson boys are aware of this, but I do hope that Brian and Diesel are not overrelying on them.

If you read this and would like to join the prayer chain, feel free to do so.